June 2008
May 2008
a typical conversation between two atypical types
- Jack: also penis jokes? really?
- Me: nothing is a source of greater humor than a person's bits and pieces
- Jack: really?
- Jack: bits?
- Jack: really?
- Me: bits. Seriously. Bits.
- Jack: ok I'm on for the bits
- Jack: i submit to the bits argument
- Jack: pieces though i take very seriously
- Jack: also the word moot
- Me: It is moot to mention moot
- Jack: i find moot to be germaine to the moot discussion of moot
- Jack: MOOT
- Jack: you are at werk?
- Me: nope
- Me: on my way to the doctor's
- Jack: o
- Me: physical time
- Me: and getting my bits and... bits... checked out.
- Jack: doctors are fun, i met one last week, she stabbed me with needles
- Jack: then her assistants stabbed me
- Jack: then they asked me to come back
- Me: you need to be less stab-able
- Me: or make them feel less stabby
- Jack: apparently i give needle bearers boners
- Me: really tiny ones with sharp ends
- Jack: see that was my joke
- Jack: have fun at doctors
- Me: I will
- Me: hang in there, stabbed-upon moot bit
- Jack: that was an amalgamation of previous jokes
- Me: I'm good like that
U.F.S.I.
- Moose: well, I was looking over my objectives for work (which I do regularly now to ensure that I'm staying focused on my workplan)
- Moose: F*CK FLYING STINGING INSECT BRB
“We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be.”
—Kurt Vonnegut, Mother Night
“To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there’s no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.”
—Jack Handey
juicy fruit
- me: I can't seem to focus but I need to
- I have this brochure i need to write up about pricing and promotions for retailers of alcohol
- me: the creativity juices have been stifled by the macaroni and cheese juices
- Biff: hahaha mmmm
- me: oh well. Maybe I can stimulate nervous digestive juices because i've got a big presentation to give tomorrow
“It is a paradoxical but profoundly true and important principle of life that the most likely way to reach a goal is to be aiming not at that goal itself but at some more ambitious goal beyond it.”
—Arnold Toynbee
